Palejovo ABC - DIVORCE

One of the more distressing experiences for a child is the separation or divorce of parents. Often this solution, although painful and bought with stress, turns out to be the only good option. Trying to maintain the relationship solely for the sake of the child would do more harm than good to all family members.

During this challenging time, it is important to take care of your own emotions and not flood your child with them. Then it will be easier to take care of the child, who also needs exceptional support during this period.

The way children react to information about the separation of their parents depends on their age, personality and the circumstances of the separation. Often the first reactions in children are shock, sadness, frustration, anger or disbelief. This time can be eased somewhat by parents avoiding arguments and heated discussions in the presence of the child, as well as reassuring them that they are not responsible for the separation of their parents. After all, it happens that children look to themselves to blame for their parents' decision, and it's important for them to know that it belongs solely to the adults.

It's natural that when faced with a breakup, different emotions will arise - both in children and adults. An important part of this period is to reassure children that people react differently to changes in life and that all emotions that arise are normal. It happens, too, that if there were heated arguments or even violence at home before the breakup, family members will feel relief and calm in response to the separation. These may be interspersed with sadness, anxiety or anger. However, all these emotions and states are perfectly normal reactions. It's also a good idea to talk to the child about what's going on with the parents and how they are currently feeling, to minimize the risk of children blaming themselves for their parents' difficult emotions or trying to comfort their caregivers at all costs. During the perinatal period, it is also important for parents to have the support of other close adults, friends or professionals. However, there should never be a situation where a child - even a teenager - becomes the confidant and caregiver.

When parents separate, it is a period of heightened tension and difficulty for the child. He or she has to cope with the challenges of everyday life and growing up, plus face the new reality that comes with divorce. And there can be many changes: a new apartment or house, a new school, new acquaintances, moving to another locality, less frequent contact with one of the parents, having to stay with the parent's new partner or partner, etc. For this reason, it is worthwhile to warn the teachers at the child's kindergarten or school what kind of situation the child has to face. This will give facility staff a chance to take better care of the child and increase their vigilance and attentiveness to the child 's behavior and well-being.

No matter what path the parents take and whether or not they are able to talk to each other, the key thing for the child is to reassure him or her that they still remain his or her parents and that their love for the child still continues and that will not change.

The topic of separation and divorce is very broad and requires an individual approach depending on the family and its situation. Therefore, if you are going through this challenging period now and need support, you can benefit from a meeting with our psychologist.